Remember how the last post I sounded so down? I'll break some details here.
To make things short, I applied for an exchange program but wasn't shortlisted despite fulfilling the grades, and the worst part of it is it was only my department that had such a small quota of 5 eligible students, while I was 6th/7th on the list.
Thinking about it, I was quite eager to be accepted, so when I got the email, it took me some time to let the reality sink in, something that I think is good in a way that I don't react to disappointing moments immediately. So subsequently my days were rather.... sore. A few of my friends had asked if I was successful, and when I told them, it was this line that tugged the really sore string inside: "You can apply again next year.", “明年再申请过。”... While I firmly believe that is more or less the only acceptable reply in response to my situation, I felt as though that sentence reflected a lot on the unseen forces that make us who we are, and hence, I didn't feel good at all.
I'm already trying to make this YouTube effort work, and I don't need other factors to tell me I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH. I've had enough of things telling me indirectly that I'm not good enough. I HAVE HAD ENOUGH.
So instead of doing nothing at all, I decided to go against the norm, and appealed. I sent out some emails, met with my tutor bla bla bla.... I figured that it was easier to fight for my chance than to wait to apply for another year, because who knows what other commitments will show up the next year.
So fast forward 2 weeks, I got a call from the International Office, and voila~ My Head Of Department managed to get extra place for exchanging students, and I was one of them. =)
So technically, the dust is over and I'm back from the dark days.
But truthfully, I was about to accept my fate after my last email, and decided that if I'm to be denied entirely, I will be denied entirely. There's no half rejection of sorts, and I was gonna just accept that fact. But, guess some things are worth fighting for.
So here's the catch of this exchange: It'll be for a year. And I might not be able to find a piano there for my YouTube activities....
BUT again, I'm not going to let some factors such as this affect my promise. I will find a way to have my piano with me, be it a keyboard or a digital piano, as long as I can continue my efforts in making materials. OR I can find other materials to make? Who knows? I might turn into a comedian for a year!
So one of the 2 songs that kept me busy during those days is this lovely Chinese song by Bell 宇田, and it's called 蝌蚪, literally "Tadpole". And also another anime song which I have always wanted to play. (It'll be a secret for now...)
Also, I'll be launching my new site soon as my Sheet Archive, since Google Docs just doesn't seem neat enough.
So until then, I will return to making videos each week since its already SUMMER BREAK!!.... after my last paper on the 30th of May~
I hope to have your continual support. Thank you for 300 subs~
SHEETS WILL BE MADE!
PS: I've noticed on my analytics that the number of people coming here are rather consistent. I would love to know you guys, so maybe leave a comment or something? I could prepare something special if you did =)
No comments:
Post a Comment