If Only I Had Not Doubted.

Another post, another upload. As usual. =) (Long post. Please spare some time. It has a story about me.)

If Only I Had Not Doubted

The piece of music that I covered for this time is a Korean Drama called Jackpot. A drama is nothing without some cover-worthy OST, and this drama has quite a nice collection indeed. Link will be provided at the end of this post. 

I wonder if you guys here have EVER looked into my channel bio and video list? If you haven't, you might have noticed a REALLY OLD VIDEO I made. In fact, it was my FIRST piano cover of a Korean Drama LOVE RAIN. An amateur's video. 

Love Rain

Coincidentally, Jackpot has the very same actor in Love Rain: Jang Geun Suk. Seeing him again after SO MANY years had me thinking back of that time when I made my first ever video recording. 

Back then, I didn't watch much of anything so when my friends introduced Love Rain to me because Yoona was also acting in it (YEP, IM A SONE!!), I gave it a try. The OST Love Rain caught my attention, and out of nowhere, I had the inkling to cover the piece. It was really simple, really touching and beautiful song. Maybe it was the story that made the OST stand out from the rest, and it was played at very romantic scenes, which brought out THE FEELS. 

So cute couple <3

I really wanted to play it, so I started my first arrangement. At that time, my technical skills were rather limited, and I wasn't so creative. So I just went on to make the easiest arrangement possible: LEFT HAND SHALL PLAY CHORDS, RIGHT HAND SINGLE LINE MELODY. 

So I practiced it, recorded it, edited some intro slides, uploaded it, and LEFT IT. Looking back, leaving the video alone after uploading it was easily one of the most REGRETFUL thing I have ever done. 

Did I mention that I was a c***rd at that time? I was.

I thought I wasn't good enough to get attention because many people had already made their own covers of Love Rain on YouTube. I thought that I was just going to do it FOR FUN. I made my mind back then that once I uploaded it, I wouldn't look at it, because it was SO SIMPLE A COVER. I saw the community as one that looked for QUALITY videos. I thought mine didn't have quality due to obvious reasons. HOW WRONG I WAS.

So it was left for a good while. I ignored all comments made. ALL. Because I was too much of a coward to see that people might flame me for being so bad at piano. I was scared to be called a BAD player. When I had gathered a LOT of courage to visit the video, I was upset. 

Don't jump the gun. Here are some of the comments:

Reality hit me SO HARD. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIEiF08Bt_E Watch it here.

It turned out that people actually LIKED my VIDEO. I also had 15 subscribers! I just couldn't believe it. What I thought was nothing, was actually something. After that, I just regretted my damn attitude for being such a coward.

I wonder, if only I had not doubted myself, would my channel be bigger than it is now? Some times I would even cry silently in my own room, blaming myself for being such a CHICKEN. So immature. 

To those who made the comments, I am sorry. I am sorry I didn't respond to you. I am sorry I didn't follow up with your expectations. I was a fool. I really wish I could turn back time and continue to make videos back then and let you all know me better. Right now, I can only take that as a painful lesson, and make sure I work to make QUALITY work so that I won't disappoint you all. Your support means A LOT to me PERSONALLY, and thank everyone who reads this for making me reach 3 digit subscribers last month. I PROMISE never to leave again. 

Thank you for supporting me then and now. Hopefully in the future, you will still be here. Let's make it to 4 digits. THANK YOU.

With love,

-DrewyJin- (aka AndrewJH)

Here it is. Jackpot OST 1: When Time Stops